Our Sprint

I laid in bed last night unable to sleep for reasons I will expound on in a moment. In fact, I have had trouble falling asleep over the last 2 nights. I made several attempts to sleep. I first planned my day today. When that didn't work, I moved on to thinking about how sleepy I was in an effort to convince my brain it would be best for all of us if it would shut down. When the first two options did nothing for me, I began to write this blog entry in my head. I came up with a great title and everything, and then I fell asleep. Can't remember a thing I came up with.

In my efforts to be a more faithful blogger, I had planned on writing another entry earlier in the week. It was going to be a short one because as of Monday, there wasn't much to blog about in this new adoption journey. Boy, did that change on Tuesday! I thought this journey was going to be more of a walk, but God intervened and turned it into a sprint! So, here goes.....While I was picking Bennett up from his sitter on Tuesday, I missed a call from an out of state number. They left a message, so I checked it as soon as I could. It was the adoption agency we had used with Bennett. I thought nothing about it other than they were probably calling about paperwork questions I had had a month ago. I couldn't have been more shocked when I heard the reason for the call. The familiar voice on the other end informed me that Bennett's birthmom was pregnant again and was requesting that we accept the baby. I was overwhelmed with emotion both good and bad. As crazy as it sounds, it had never crossed our minds that we would get this phone call. I was excited for the opportunity to pray about it, but heartbroken for her that she was going to live this out yet again. The remainder of the evening my little tear ducts were constantly full. I can't adequately articulate how shocked I was. Even though we had willingly entered into this process again and the goal of this process is to bring another child into our family to love, I never thought that the situation that God brought us would be this one. I had been daydreaming since before we began the journey this time of what our next child would be, and for those of you who have talked to me, you know that a fully Caucasian, half sibling to the child I have was not on the radar screen. Let me interject something here, if I may.....I wasn't disappointed nor saddened that we received this phone call. It's just a lot to process in a short amount of time and I'm just being transparent as to all the emotions I felt in a matter of a couple of minutes. For the sacredness of time, I will try to spare you all the details and just hit the high points from this point forward. We were told her due date is June the 7th and that it of course would be a scheduled c-section at least one week prior to that. We have vacation planned the week before Memorial Day in Florida, and I was feeling the stress of the time crunch. But since God is faithful and knew I was stressing out over a tiny detail, he just lovingly took care of it for me. It turns out that "T" (as I'll call her) recently relocated to Florida, so if the baby was to come early, we would already be in the state. She really wants to travel to Utah again for delivery, which is more than likely where we will be, but God has worked it out in case she doesn't make it there.

She has opted to not find out the gender, but it is included in her medical records. The agency is going to call as soon as they receive the records to update us on how things have been going and let us know if Bennett is going to have a brother or a sister. The last part of that sentence just made me breathe deep! The reality of this has definitely sunk in the last couple of days. Once the decision was made, and both Jonathan and I were completely full of peace, a huge amount of excitement settled in. Seeing as we only had 5 days notice with Bennett, a month seems and feels like an eternity! That just doesn't seem long at all to get as prayed up as I feel I need to be. I will keep posting as we get updates on the newest member of our family, but until then, if you could just pray for the health of T and the baby. And also that God would begin to soften her heart again to be loved by us. He was so faithful to us before, and I know that he will be faithful again, but I know there is a bigger reason for this opportunity than just to grow our family. Thanks for praying for us! We are really excited! Until next time......